Do Turkeys FLY?!

It’s Throwback Thursday y’all! And today’s #TBT will feature a #countrylife story going back to my VERY FIRST day on the farm:

It was my first morning in our new home and I was alone and eating breakfast when I started to hear a knocking. The following internal dialogue took place:

“WHAT IS THAT? Who could possibly be knocking? Our driveway is a mile long! It’s not like someone could have snuck up on me!”

…cats go scurrying under the bed…

…I consider also scurrying under the bed…

“Ok. Must investigate. Here we go. I can read the newspaper headline now: ‘City girl gets killed by weird serial killer that claims his victims in broad daylight and after insistently knocking.’ …Do they have a newspaper here? Maybe we should get the Sunday delivered for coupons… I bet they don’t deliver down our driveway. I’d have to walk two miles on Sunday mornings for coupons…Ok, focus, I still hear knocking.”

…check the front door…

…check the side door…

…grab my cell phone and a broom so I can simultaneously call the police and beat the serial killer with a broom…

…finally tiptoe out onto the deck…

“This is how horror movies start. I’m the girl that gets lured outside and investigates the noise. I hate that girl, I can’t be that girl. I’m holding my cell phone like I’ll have time to make a call to the VOLUNTEER police services in this town of 1,456 residents. I am SO that girl…”

…and look over the rail at the basement door…

“…WHAT IS THAT. ARE THOSE FEATHERS?”

turkey2

“Oh my gosh I think that’s a turkey. Could that be a turkey? Knocking? I’m confused.”

…creep back inside, down the stairs, and slowly open the door so I can see where the turkey/serial killer would be standing…

turkey

“THAT’S A TURKEY. KNOCKING ON MY DOOR. I should try and record this. No one will ever believe me.”

This story ends with a short voice mail that I left after going back upstairs, out onto the deck:

:whispering: “Hey Josh. It’s me. Sooo I think a turkey is knocking on our back door…

…turkey hears me on deck and starts to fly away…

:suddenly shouting: “OH WAIT. DO TURKEYS FLY? It’s flying away?! Maybe it’s a vulture? I don’t know, but it flew!

:shriek: “Ahhh I just walked into a spider web.”

:slightly ashamed: “Call me back.”

I may or may not have needed to edit the language of my voice mail transcription. Which Josh STILL has saved on his phone since he thinks me almost being murdered by a polite, day time serial killer is hysterical.

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10 thoughts on “Do Turkeys FLY?!

  1. I never tire of hearing/reading about this story. I didn’t know turkeys could fly either! Lol best welcome neighbor ever! You really can’t make this stuff up lol. πŸ™‚

    • Cailyn says:

      I am so glad I got the video…because I am not sure anyone would have really believed the turkey was ACTUALLY knocking!

    • Cailyn says:

      This sounds like a #sorryimnotsorry… But I understand. It’s funny. If you’re not the one contemplating serial killer headlines or walking into spiderwebs (leave a message and I’ll call you baccck).

  2. Oh. My. Goodness. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? I would have totally freaked out! All I kept thinking was thank god it was a glass door and you could see through it, otherwise you would have opened the door to see who it was and been ATTACKED!

    • Cailyn says:

      I know right?! Legit knocked on my door. I still can’t believe it happened. I posted it on Butterball’s Facebook page at Thanksgiving last year πŸ™‚ “Dinner comes knocking…”

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